5 Mistakes all new moms make.....
OK mamas, let’s face it, we do it ALL!!
We take the pregnancy test, grow our beautiful baby bellies, get ALL the attention, go to our doctor appointments. The loneliness and isolation of our significant other can start right away, UNLESS WE TAKE ACTION FROM DAY ONE!!!
5 THINGS WE DO WRONG AS SOON AS WE GET PREGNANT!!!!!
Most of the time, we don’t even realize what we are doing. We are strong, we are fierce, we birth babies, we can do everything right? Right. That doesn’t mean we should though. Here’s a list of all the things we do wrong, followed by all the ways to fix it!!
We take the pregnancy test without him
We think we have to do everything ourselves
We go to doctor appointments alone
We plan the baby room ourself
We don’t realize that our guys want to be involved, just as much as we do!!
Your step by step guide to include your significant other through each step of your pregnancy together:
IT STARTS PRENATALLY!!!
There’s PLENTY of things we can do to involve our significant other!!
Include him for the pregnancy test!! NOTE: at NO time is it ok to tell your sister/mother/friend about the pregnancy, before your significant other knows!! (I know, we get a little excited right!!!)
Go through Pinterest together to get ideas for your pregnancy announcement (Let him book the maternity and birth photographer, just make sure he does it asap)
Make baby room decor decisions together (give him 2 of your choices and let him decide….it’s a win/win).
Have him paint the nursery walls and put the crib/furniture together..total guys stuff!!
Go to doctor appointments together. If he can’t be there for the big appointments (hearing baby’s heartbeat for the first time, finding out the sex of the baby)….facetime. If he can’t facetime, set your phone up and record it. These are BIG moments and he wants to be included, even if he can’t be there in person.
Keep a journal of your pregnancy, (I doubt he’ll keep his own), so ask him his thoughts/ his feelings on certain things and write them down. These are great to look back on down the road.
Go to prenatal classes together, focus on everything he can do to help you birth your baby together
The BIG day is HERE,
now what??
You both might be freaking out at this point, stay calm!!
Gently remind him to load both of your bags into the car
Remind him of ALL the wonderful ways he learned to support you during labor
Ask for little things here and there… a sip of water, your make up bag (Keep him involved)
Thank him for supporting you (YES, I’m well aware that you are the one laboring, but a little love goes a long way :)
Have him notify your birth photographer that you are on your way to the hospital and have him text her with each vaginal check (SO IMPORTANT!!)
Your baby is finally here!!!
Have him cut the cord
Let him brag about putting the first diaper on
Have him do skin to skin with baby!! (HINT: This is a great photo opportunity for your birth photographer :) We mom’s get skin to skin, so why not include dad in on that bonding??!!!
Let him announce the sex of the baby to your family (If you haven’t both already spilled the beans prior to today)
Keep him involved in the care of this amazing little being you both created together!!
Taking your baby home……
This is an amazing day!! This is also when our maternal instincts go full blown crazy though!!!
We are already exhausted and want everything to go perfectly….right??
Just remember…your baby will be fine (NO MATTER WHAT, as long as he or she is fed and isn’t dropped on their head)..your baby with be fine….literally! Take in these moments, laugh together…it’s a learning process.
My poor husband married a nursery nurse. THE POOR GUY!! (Talk about a perfectionist…Me…ugh…IF i only knew then, what I know now….) sigh.
Have him change the diaper before the 3am feeding (or warm the bottle while you change the diaper). What ever it is, make it a team effort
Have him give baby’s bath (I promise you, it won’t be like you would do it, but seriously, WHO CARES!!! He knows how to clean himself, he can wash a baby. So bite your tongue!
Run quick errands here and there! It’ll be good for you to get out of the house and it’ll make him feel great, for surviving without you!!
You’ve had baby around for a couple weeks now…
So baby has been around for a couple weeks now. You’re both feeling pretty good about surviving the sleep deprivation and have managed not to hurt anyone up to this point, lol…Keep up the good work mama!!
Even though every ounce of your being says that this amazing little bundle of joy is your priority, take note:
Take time for yourself, have lunch with a friend, get your nails done. Leave him alone with the baby while you go pamper yourself (absolutely NO guilt here mama, you deserve this!!). GO! Do it!! He will be fine (you’re only a phone call away and it’ll make him feel really good that he was able to do this by himself)!!
Tell dad to go do something for himself, lunch with a guy friend…. When you work together as unit, towards one common goal, it helps you understand what each is going through, support each other, and be there for one another.
The SINGLE best advice for you after having a baby is to continue to DATE ONE ANOTHER!! Your marriage is the utmost priority!!! Your baby needs you to love and support one another….NEVER stop dating each other, no matter what!! Get out of the house, go for dinner/movie. Make each other a priority!! Having a baby will change your marriage, but if you go into this with the understanding that your marriage is priority #1, priority #2 will have amazing parents to learn from.